Practicing
Christian Living at Home 3:18-4:1
During the time of Paul, a typical household consisted
of relationships between husband and wife; parents and children; and family and
slaves (servants). The section explodes suddenly into the context of the
epistle without the marks of a transition from what went before in the text. It
marks a switch from that spiritual family to the physical one.[1] It
has been inferred that this has been borrowed from outside sources and
Christianized.[2] It
seems that most hold that the background is the Roman household code.[3] This
may be, but so what? There are common areas of ethics in the world. However,
there seems to be no clear consensus as to the background of the injunctions.
They are not Christianization of worldly ethics, if anything they are an
overlapping of ethics.
This section of responsibility. Gromacki points this
out clearly:
Corporate oneness (ein) position
does not abrogate individual responsibility and function. Racial, social, and sexual
distinctions remain, even though there is equality in Christ.[4]
Responsibility begins at home. The home is the oldest
institution on earth. It was established in the garden before the fall with
Adam and Eve.
This section consists of three subsections centered
around members of the household: (1) Wives and husbands, (2) children and
fathers, and (3) slaves and masters. A number of things can be observed:
- Each section deals with a member of a household.
- In each case Paul deals with the secondary member first and then the one in authority.
- This Colossians 3:18-4:1 is one self-contained unit with three pairs of reciprocal exhortations.[5]
- It is a series of admonitions addressed to six members of the household.
- They deal with mutual or reciprocal obligations,[6] and are not one- sided.
- Ephesians 5:22-6:9 is an parallel to these admonitions.
Wives and
husbands 3:18-19
This subsection is made of two commands—one to wives,
the other to the husbands.
- To the wives: “be subject to your husbands as is fitting the Lord” (3:18). The word subject is a compound word mean to arrange under. It carries the idea of submission or subordinate, but not subjection. This has nothing to do with women being inferior to man. It is in the middle voice, indicating a voluntary act by the wives. As an imperative it could be translation “freely submit yourselves.” It is a military word where the soldiers are under order or directions of an officer.[7] To Paul, submission between husband and wife is a two-way street. The great example is in sexual relations where one is not to forbid the other, rather is to grow out of mutual consent (1 Cor. 7:3-6). Dunn makes an important observation “that wives and not women generally who are in view” in contrast to 1 Cor. 14:34.[8] However, Scripture does not warrant that women are to be subject to all men. This passage qualifies the submission in two ways:
First, it is restrictive in that it
is dealing exclusively with the husband-wife relationship.
Second, although authority is the
underlining principle, it is not an overbearing authority over the wife. It is
a voluntary acceptance of authority on the part of the wife, not an enforced
one by the husband. There is no evidence that submission to Christ is a forced
submission.
The means or basis of the exercise
of submission by the wife is not controlled by the husband, but the Lord. It is
governed by “as is fitting in the Lord”
(3:18). We should note the following observations:
First, it notes the object of
appropriate submission is the Lord. The word fit or fitting is a
compound word in the Greek (aneko) made up of the words up and come, therefore to come up to, that which is becoming, or what is
proper. It speaks of a standard, in this case the standard behavior of the
wife.
Second, it marks the
manner of submission to the husband and the will of God. Campbell clearly notes:
It is of course understood that
believing wives are to arrange themselves under their husbands not to do that
which is contrary to the will of God (cf. Acts 4:9).[9]
The submission to the standard of
Christ outweighs the wrongful authority or commands of the husband.
Third, it speaks of the idea of
duty.
Fourth, it disarms the idea to behave in
accordance with the common social order, but goes beyond that to the higher order
of the Lord.
- To the husband: “love your wives and do not be embittered against them” (3:19). This injunction is not in contrast to the above injunction, but given a counterpart with it. The implication is that submission is gained by love. There is a natural connection between the two. This injunction to the husband is twofold—positive and negative.
First, the positive: “love your wives.” The word for love is the Greek word agapao, the highest form for love.
Campbell gives us five ways in which the word is used in the New Testament:[10]
1.
There is a
direct correlation between love and the willingness to forgive (cf. Luke 7:47).
2.
Love causes
one to give of himself for the others, even to the point of death. It is a
sacrificing love (cf. John 3:16), We could call it a Calvary love.
3.
Love is not
transient but permanent (cf. John 131).
4.
Love shows
itself in grace and mercy (Eph. 2:4).
5.
Love
disciplines and trains a person to be more like the Lord (Heb. 2:6).
He goes on to note:
As we apply these meanings to the husband’s
relation to his wife we have something that is very tangible. Husbands who love their wives will always be
ready to forgive them, to give themselves for them, to be steady and
unchangeable in their love, to show mercy toward them, and to help train them
to be more like the Lord.[11]
Love is to be continuous and
enduring in all circumstances. It is to be eternal in quality. It forgives,
cleanses, and sanctifies. It is the love of Christ for His Church (Eph.
5:26-27).
Second, “do not be embittered against them” (3:19). The word embittered
means sour, bitter, or harsh. It is a word which reflects a sinful inclination
(cf. Acts 8:23). The conjunction “and”
which connects the two injunctions, is an exegetical conjunction, giving a
meaningful example of what love entails. Paul instructs us “to put away” all
bitterness (Eph. 4:31). Notice in the context this is put away by forgiveness
(Eph. 4:32). Paul is arguing that bitterness is overcome by love and the power
of the Holy Spirit, which is displayed by forgiveness. The practice of which is
to begin with our relationship with our wives. There is no room for harshness
in our relationship with our wife, others, and the church.
To be continued…
[1] Moo, PNTC; COLOSSIANS AND PHILEMON, 293,
[2] E. Glenn Hinson,
“The Christian Household in Colossians 3:18-4:1,” REVIEW AND EXPOSITORY,
Electronic media, date unknown.
[3] Dunn, NIGTC:
COLOSSIANS AND PHILEMON, 244; THEOLOGY OF PAUL, [Grand Rapids MI, Eerdmans,
1998], 666-667; Moo, PNTC: COLOSSIANS AND PHILEMON, 294-296; Harold W. Hoehner,
EPHESIANS: AN EXEGETICAL COMMENTART, [Grand Rapids MI, Baker, 2002], 720-729,
[4] Gromacki, STAND
PERFECT, 146.
[6] Barclay, DSB:
COLOSSIANS, 192.
[7] Gromacki, STAND PERFECT, 147.
[8] Dunn, NIGTC: COLOSSIANS AND PHILEMON, 247.
[10] Ibid, 160.
[11] Ibid, 160,
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